Flame

brain thoughts:

I don't listen to instrumental music often enough.

the idea of a puppy kind of makes me want to find the place in which I'd like to stay put, already.

I have quite a bit of tattoo real estate left. this is good.

I'm in love with somebody I don't yet know.

I don't know where to go or what to do or who to see, but I trust God and his love for me and its evidence in His provision, and that knowledge is all that's worth searching for.

Road trips are the best escapes, and that's why I think the flexibility and freedom on a motorcycle will result in the stability I need to move ahead with work and education and friendships and just general peace, really.

I have so much I'd like to do, even the things I don't yet know I want, and it pains me more to imagine still wishing for them ten years from now with no means to do them than it does to imagine leaving as soon as I get comfortable again.

I have to leave. I'll be back.

I'd like to adopt a few of my children.

I don't know why I haven't been to a concert in ages, but it doesn't concern me much. I'm more intrigued by the break from habit than I am by the opportunity to continue it.

I'm not as moody as I was before and I don't know why. it's usually the lack of understanding that triggers it, and so I'm standing by. but for a long while now, I'm never without reason to smile.

God answers prayers.

I am traveling without traveling. I am on the cusp, the brink, the wind. I am a hermit and gypsy and nomad, I am Tinkerbell, I am the Little Prince, I am Fantastic Mr. Fox. I write and read this story, I take pictures I wish required a darkroom to develop. I love loving even more than the people I love sometimes, and I wish someone would climb trees with me. I want to go rock climbing and camping and hiking and skiing and I want to play poker and catch fireflies and hold my breath for as long as I can. I want to listen, laugh, and speak, in that order, and never before listened, laughed, or spoken to. I want to give and to receive, I want to float and to burn, I want to jump and to fly, I want to connect a string between two cans and call it a zipline.

I want to work on the knot within me for as long as it takes, and I want to find what oils it free.

I will turn the oil to flame. I'll use it to light my way home.