Thrive
"You're going to have to walk on water."
This is a picture of my heart. Well, of me. But if you were to ask me how I'm doing here, here in this city where the people are nowhere near as mean as you all said they would be, where it takes me three minutes to walk to work, where I hear "Welcome to the Empire State Building!" on a daily basis, where I can get a McDonald's ice cream cone at 1:30am for $1.08, I would show you this picture.
My interpretation of this phase of my life has transitioned. I thought of it as the part of my life where I get a degree so I can join society as an educated person. I thought of my choice to go to King's as a nice way to get into the greatest city in the world, and to keep God in the forefront while I'm at it. I don't feel that way anymore. I know now that God brought me here to become who I should be.
Interjection: I was never on board with the whole "get ready, college will change you" thing. I've always been fairly self-assured....eh, who am I kidding. Extremely self-assured, and I didn't like people thinking that I would mature into a whole new person. I didn't realize the level of maturity they meant. Honestly, the level I'm experiencing is probably not what "they" mean until "they're" about 35. But hey.
So anyway, God brought me here to become who I should be, and I can't explain how I know that (to the certain someone I know and love who will ask me to explain it when I come home for, oh, 4 hours or so), but it's true. I now see that I was brought here to deepen Our relationship (if He's part of the pronoun, I figure I should capitalize it, no? heh). I'm surrounded by people who foster and encourage love, mercy, justice, and accountability. I get to hang out with these people, hang out with the God of the universe, and get a degree while I'm at it. In New York City.
On a heavier note, I do not care to entertain the fact that I'm on a peak of life, or that that peak can become a valley in one moment. But since I do entertain the fact, my head gets full. Or, as Foer would say, my boots get heavy. And then you know what's nice at the end of the day? Asking God to wear them for me.
So. Whether you actually made it this far into the post or you skipped ahead to the part where you expect an almighty conclusion, thank you for reading. The almighty conclusion happened a bit earlier, by the way.
(HA! I slay me.)
P.S. Tomorrow, I put on my dancing boots! Huzzah!
2 comments:
luce, not only do i share these feelings with you but i have experienced all of them. I love hearing this but i hate not experiencing it with you. I am so comforted to know that you are " there" with me. I love u so dearly my love and I cant wait to see and talk for 4 hours about the amazing layers of growing in God.
until next time, M
Hi Lucy,
It sounds like you are content, and growing in good ways.
I'm thankful for that.
Learning to put HIM first, trust in HIM, and obey HIM, is a great step in the right direction.
I Love you so much!
Your Grandma Phoebelou
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